Hello!
...and Welcome to this issue of Time to Think - the e-zine for professional women - dedicated to helping you thrive.
Been on any good time management courses recently? If time management is something you struggle with, and you long for more time for yourself, then you need to read this issue's main article - and find out the secrets the time management gurus don't tell you....
And, an exciting annoucement....
Drum-roll...... The Results Agency website has been upgraded, rewritten and improved!! (Trumpets :-) So if you haven't visited for a while, check it out, and discover:
- Whether Whole Life Coaching is a fit for you (Does This Fit?)
- How Whole Life Coaching works - what makes it effective, and what makes it distinctive (How It Works?)
- What clients' say about Whole Life Coaching (Client Stories)
- The core belief that may be holding you back... (The Most Limiting Belief of All)
- Plus top tips, exercises, and an index of previous Time to Think articles.
And while you're there, make sure you download your free copy of the Life Audit workbook.
How to Have Time for the Things that Matter
(The secrets most time management courses don't teach you...)
There used to be a t-shirt slogan that read: “So many men … so little time.” Nowadays, most women’s t-shirts would more aptly read “So many lists … so little time.”!!
If you’re typical of the women I talk to, then better time management is in your “top 5 things I need in my life”.
But somehow it seems elusive.
Perhaps you’ve already been on time management courses, and nothing’s really changed. You’ve tried colour coding your diary, but it’s still full of things you don’t really want to be doing…
What’s the problem?
What time management gurus often fail to mention …
If you’ve been beating yourself up about not being better at time management, there’s something you probably need to hear:
(Despite a billion dollar “time management” industry) you can’t “manage time”.
No, honestly. You can’t.
Whether you measure it by the tick of a clock, or the beat of your heart, you can’t stop time, move it, store it, re-use it, or replenish it. Time cannot be bought, borrowed, given away or leased back.
Trying to manage something over which you have no control only serves up disappointment and feelings of failure. (On top of which you still ‘haven’t got time’ for relaxation, joy and the people that matter.) Sound familiar?
Give yourself a break - stop beating yourself up about the (completely normal) fact that you’re struggling to “manage your time effectively”.
And let’s focus on what does work.
What Works:
While "time management" courses encourage efficiency,
There is only one way to have time FOR the things that matter. And that is to allocate time and attention TO the things that matter.
Sounds simple doesn’t it? And, in fact, it is simple … just not necessarily easy.
Especially if you find it tough to say “No”. Or you’ve been in the habit of “multi-tasking your life away”. Or, you’ve bought in to an idea of success that involves doing more, faster and in less time.
So you spend your days striving to produce a ‘better life’ that presumably you’re going to enjoy at some point in the future.
If you put the things that matter – your ‘life priorities’ - at the heart of your agenda, you can enjoy that better life now. Not someday.
Because, no matter what you might think your priorities are, in reality you create your priorities by how you spend your time and where you put your attention. Moment by moment, day by day.
So what are you making a priority? That is, to what are you giving your time, energy and attention?
Action Point: Go back through your diary for the last 3 months. Imagine you’re looking at the diary of a stranger. What would you say her priorities are?
How do these compare with what’s really important to you?
Feel free to share this e-zine with friends & colleagues...who do you know that would benefit from reading this?
Get regular Time to Think...The Time Factor
As I touched on earlier, if the things that are important to you are not in your diary on a regular basis, then you will struggle to find joy and meaning in your life.
Most people start with their to-do list and schedule their time accordingly. (And hope that there’s some time left over for the things that matter.)
This is how day-to-day priorities can turn into your life priorities.
The key here (as Stephen Covey points out) is not to prioritise your schedule, but to “schedule your priorities”.
Start with what’s important. (Rather than what’s urgent, and/or beeping the loudest.) Schedule it. This applies at work at well as at home.
Action Point: Make a “joy list” ... What brings joy and meaning to your life? Write it down. Then, for each of the items on your list, write down three specific things that you could do to experience some of that joy and meaning.
Now get out your diary and schedule one or two of these activities a week for the next 6 weeks. (Top tip – "Ring-fence" your time: Use pen and draw a line around the space in your diary.)
Time is not the only issue...
The Attention Factor – The other ‘secret’ they don't tell you …
When you do have time to yourself, do you find it hard to "switch off"? Do you sometimes refuse to take work home, then find yourself brooding about it all evening anyway?
There is no point in scheduling an hour of pampering/hill-walking/taking the kids to the park if your attention is miles away.
Similarly, all the time management tools in the world will not help you feel in control if your attention if splintered across 17 different things at once.
While you can remember the past, and imagine the future, the only time you can actually experience is NOW.
Perhaps one of the reasons you feel you are short of time, is that your attention is rarely in the present?
Reclaim control of your attention. And not only will it feel like you have more time, you'll be able to make the most of opportunities to relax.
Action Point: Get in the habit of clearing your "head-smog"! When you want to leave work behind in spirit as well as in body, you need a mental "clear-down". Try the Smog Eliminator exercise.
Getting Back in Control of Your Life
Of course, "time management" courses can give you useful ideas for getting organised and being more efficient.
But rather than “How can I manage my time better?”, the question: “How can I manage my self better?” will bring you far greater (and easier) rewards.
To enjoy a fulfilled, happy and successful life, the key areas of self management are:
- Behaving as if what you SAY is important to you (at home and at work), really is
- Reclaiming your attention, so that you can fully experience the things that actually make life worth living.
This is THE key to getting a grip on your life, and, your schedule.
Find out more about how YOU can start to re-establish what's important in your life, by arranging a free consultation...
About the Author: Helen Ross-Hamilton is a holistic coach specialising in helping professional women who want to stop striving and start thriving. Find out more and get free on-line resources at www.theresultsagency.co.uk
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Need to chill out, unwind or re-energise? You've come to the right place...
This time I'm issuing you with a bit of a challenge!! How much of a challenge will depend on how addicted you are
to your electronic gadgets and gismos... :-)
Your challenge is to spend the next convenient weekend with all of your electronic 'attention grabbers' switched off. Why? Studies show that many of the stresses of the modern world are to do with never being able to feel that you can "switch off", and actually "get away from it all".
So if you "dance to the tune of your cellphone", here is a way to rediscover peace, quiet, and freedom from the "tyranny of telecomms".
Try it. You might like it. And let me know how you get on...
Relax and Revive
That means no mobile, blackberry, PDA,
television, PC, email, playstation, alarm clock etc etc... If you can, unplug the landline too.
In the meantime, I'd love to hear your comments and feedback
on any of the topics raised in this issue - please do get in touch.
warm wishes
Helen